Darkness & Light: Book 2: Shatter Our Hope

10 - Hayley

When we return to Drecca's home, I go straight to my room. I just want to be alone.

My room is so lonely without him. I swear, I see his memory or echo .... like his hands touch mine. His lips brush against mine. He's here. But .... not.

"Drecca." My voice is breaking on his name, but I don't care. I sigh shakily and rub my face. Then, I get up and walk over to the bathroom. After I'm done, I fill the tub and strip off my clothes, then tuck my wings in as I sink into the hot water.

I hold my breath, sinking into the warmth of the tub, and just sit there, letting my feathers soak up the water, letting my lungs beg for air.  I don't know how long I stayed under the water, but as I surface, gasping, I hear a gentle knock on the door to my bathroom.

"Who is it?" I call. 

"It's Lilith," calls the familiar voice of my friend. Is she my friend? I hope so....

I shake my head in a vain attempt to clear it, and clear my throat. "Lilith, what's up? I'm using the tub."

She clicks her tongue.  "Well, I'd like to talk to you."

"Uh, can you wait?"

"Not really.... I'm sorry, Hayley," she says.

I take a deep breath.  "Fine, come on in."

Lilith opens the door. I nestle deeper into the warm water, curling my wings around myself. She stops a few feet from the tub, watching me.

"Well?" I say. "What's going on?"

"Drecca isn't dead," she says. "He is alive. But there's something wrong. I think Donovan — who's his father — has done something to hurt him. And since you two share a connection."

"Yeah, so much for that," I mutter.  "So much help said connection has done for me and him both..."

Lilith sighs.  "Yes, I know you are upset. I know you wish you could've done more, Hayley, but this isn't your fault."

"How isn't it? He cast me through that portal, and left me and Emmeranne here, but I could've helped him. I could've helped him, if he'd let me...."

"Maybe he just didn't want to let you come to harm," she says.  "Hayley, I think he loves you."

Hayley, I love you.

Tears fall down my cheeks, and I turn away from Lilith, so she might not see it. She does anyway.

"Hayley, I know this seems impossible. I know you think you have lost Drecca. But he's more resilient than even you know," she says.  She steps closer to me.   "He truly cares about you, about all of us, yes, but mostly, he loves you! And that is what could save him now"

"How could me loving him save him?" I ask her.

"Because you have a connection! Because that will show us where he is, where he is being held."

"If he is, in fact, still alive," I mutter.

"He is! Gods, when did you lose all hope?"

"Probably when these awful things keep happening," I grumble. "Probably when he was forced to choose me over himself. I wish I could believe he is okay, I really, really do, Lilith. Please, just ... tell me this wasn't all for nothing."

"It hasn't been all for nothing," she assures me.

"Are you .... " I sigh. "How can I help, Lilith?"

"Well, when you're done, meet me in the study. Because I think I know how to find him," she says.  "But for now, I hope you can finish soon. And not linger too long in your depression. He is not going to be killed, or anything. I know, because Donovan is his father, and Lord of Demons, and he will not hurt his son more than he already has. So, for now, finish up here, meet me in the study, and we can talk further then. Okay?"

I nod. "Okay, thank you for .... everything. Just .... thanks, Lilith."

She nods. "See you soon." She turns and leaves.

And I plunge my head beneath the now lukewarm water, and just sit there, ignoring the world and the thoughts that bother me. I miss Drecca, and I want him back. Now. But... maybe Lilith's right. Maybe he is okay, but I don't know how to sense whether or not he is.

Maybe he is okay, but .... maybe not. I don't know. I just need to find out whether or not he's okay. And bring him back here. Save him from whatever hellish horrors his own damn father is making him suffer through.

I just really, really hope Drecca is okay.