Sugarcubes // Finnick Odair - Hunger Games Fanfic

XV.

After our last and final act of rebellion before the games, the light switches off abruptly; the Capitols way of hiding us before our feelings cause too much of a riot among the citizens of Panem.

As the lights switch off, I immediately drop their hands. I can tell chaos is about to go down, with hormonal Capitol freaks mere feet away from us, and Ceasar still on stage. I want to be as far away from here as possible when it does happen. Right now, it's just amicable chatter compared to what could happen. I climb up a step and feel around where Finnick was standing. I grab hold of a hand that feels like his and squeeze it thrice.

He squeezes back. Three quick squeezes. We clamber down the steps, hand in hand, and onto the stage. He seems to recognize what I am doing because he takes the lead as the crowd gets too wild and too loud for me to handle. He dodges the chairs set up for Ceasar and the tributes, Ceasar himself and the curtains and leads us down the steps into the prep area. From there, getting back to the tribute center is easy, since the crowd isn't allowed past that point.

The last night here before the games sure was a chaotic one. We finally stop running when we reach the elevator of the training center. We both pile in, laughing and panting, and he pressed the button to take us up to the fourth floor. His fingers hover over the button labeled seven, and I stare at him. His eyes meet mine and I shake my head slightly. He retracts his hand slowly, and traces it down my hand, reaching my fingers and interlacing his between them. I've never held Finnick's hand like this. What a terrible time for a first.

The door opens up at the fourth floor and he swoops down and picks me up bridal style making me laugh loudly.

"Finnick!" I squeal, running my hands through his hair and tugging playfully. He carries me to the room without breaking a sweat and kicks open the door, letting me smell the strong sea breeze. The sound alarms Annie, but she immediately relaxes on seeing us. I just stop squealing to look at his eyes, and he looks at me for a moment before throwing me onto the empty space on the couch.

I gasp in mock anger, and Annie laughs.

"Welcome to our humble abode, milady." He says, taking a bow in front of me. What a peacock.

I scoff at him and sit up straight turning towards Annie. "How are you babe?" I ask her softly, brushing the red curls out of her face. She's as old as Lia.

"I'm okay," She says softly. "I don't like being back here."

"You'll get to go back soon, Annie."

"Not with both of you." She says, and there's a silence in the room as I look for what to say to that. Finnick has disappeared to change, and I'm glad he didn't hear what Annie said. It strikes me that this may very well be my last night.

"You'll have Finnick. I promise. He'll take care of you."

Her eyes widen, but before she can respond, Finnick walks out of the room and throws a pair of shirts and a shirt at my face. "Get changed Parstons."

"Who says I'll be staying, Odair?" I challenge, laughing.

"Me." He says, staring at me intently. I can't imagine I look good in my layers of makeup and hair gel with the neck of my pantsuit turned gown sticking up awkwardly.

I shrug, giving in. "Fair enough."

I grab the shorts and the top – my favorite one that appears in Finnick's closet – and head to his room, saying bye to Annie. I grab his hand on my way inside and lead him inside too. He plops himself down on the bed, staring at the sea digitally appearing on his voice as I strip off my clothes in the other side.

"This time tommorow," I tell him as I struggle with the zip, "We'll be back in the arena."

"Yeah. Not for long though. They'll get us out, won't they?" He responds, walking over and unzipping the dress for me. He returns to his spot, although I've had worse men watch me undress. I slip off my dress and pull in the shorts, tightening the drawstring and pulling the shirt over my head. I sit down next to him on the bed, turning to face him.

"Maybe. Maybe they won't. We might have to fight Finnick."

"Allies?" He asks, and I let out a small laugh, holding back my tears.

"Do you even have to ask?"

"What if we make it to the top two? Before they can save us, I mean," He asks, addressing the question that I've been dreading talking to him about. The answer to me is clear, slit my throat. Let him win. He deserves it.

I take his hands in mine slowly, and he squeezes them.

"Fin, you have to win. If they don't get us out in time, you have to win." I tell him, and his gaze hardens. It's clear he disagrees with me.

"Alas, milady, we disagree. I think you have to win."

I don't respond. It's clear to me that we will disagree on this for a while.

"Haymitch's plan will work. We just need to make sure Katniss stays alive for as long as possible." He says, and I inhale sharply. It's what we both want to believe. That there's a way for us to both come out of this unscathed. He looks straight ahead, and I can see in his eyes how much he wants to believe it, so I don't disagree.

I put my head on his shoulder.

"We'll be okay, right?" I ask unsurely. It's not right. Not right to ask him that as though he knows. But I really need somebody to tell me it'll be okay. Just for a little bit I need to be vulnerable.

"We'll be okay." He repeats, stroking my hair softly.

We stay like that, each of our trains of thought unravelling into worse and worse possibilities. He suddenly grabs me and pulls me into a bone crushing hug. I let him hug me as tears pour down my face. I can't lose him. I just can't.

I silently beg Jo to forgive me.

"God, I love you, Kendria Parstons. So much. I know it's a terrible time to tell you, but I can't go into that arena knowing I kept that from you." He says. And I nod into his shoulder.

"I love you too Finnick." And he hugs me even tighter. As though we'll lose everything if he ever lets go. And we actually might.

We might lose everything.

Published: 9 January, 2024