Remus Lupin Comfort 🤎

promise

tw ‼️ suicidal thoughts

y/n woke up a few hours later. her head throbbing, hands tingling, and throat burning. after all that emotion, she could only muster a dull echo of it now.

unreal...

it was unreal that they had the audacity to save her life, when the only thing she truly desired was to die. how dare they? y/n expected a rush of anger to finally fill the void. she was wrong. all y/n felt was a numb kind of apathy towards her life.

madam pomfrey noticed y/n woke up. she hurried over to the side of her bed.

"oh good you're awake! you gave us all quite the fright there for a second. thank merlin professor lupin found you in time. take this." madam pomfrey handed her a glass vial with greenish-blue liquid in it. "it will help with the pain."

"thanks," she whispered hoarsely, and the nurse helped her sit up carefully so she could chug the sickly-sweet potion.

so lupin was the one who found her. go figure. when would she stop being a burden on him? on the other hand, she supposed, at least it wasn't a student that discovered her secret. the thought wasn't much comfort. everyone would figure out what happened eventually considering madam pomfrey wasn't letting her leave the hospital wing anytime soon.

the urge to attempt suicide was not lessening.

next time she would do it right.

lupin's pov

madam pomfrey went to find him once y/n woke up. he had collected himself. on the outside, that is. on the inside his thoughts were still wrecking havoc, tearing through everything he should've done. but now he was prepared. together, he and mcgonagall had formulated a plan to keep y/n safe and help her recover.

lupin walked into the hospital wing, immediately landing his eyes on y/n. he nearly flinched at the hollow expression on her face. it was so closely resembling a corpse that someone could've mistaken her to be dead if her head hadn't turned to make eye contact. she offered up a weak smile at him before promptly dissolving into tears.

"i'm sorry, i'm so sorry. i wish i was dead i shouldn't be burdening you so much why didn't you let me die-"

lupin cut her off. "you will never be a burden to me. i didn't let you die because the world is so much better with you in it. i care about you so, so, much y/n. i'm sorry i've haven't been there for you like you needed me to be." he sat down on the edge of the bed. "but i'm here for you now."

"i really, really want everything to finally stop hurting," y/n whispered. "dying seems like the only way out."

"i want you to be able to live a life you don't have to constantly escape from. and i'm going to help you get there, whatever it takes." he took her hand. "i need you to trust me, okay?"

and despite all that she'd been through, y/n found the strength inside herself to nod.

hey y'all!! i'm back at school so updates are going to be a little less frequent but hopefully still consistent. i'm aiming for around once a week? thank you so much for reading and i love each of you so much 🤎