Amber

Chapter 23

November 1, 2014

Dear Journal,

Brad's not as perfect as I once thought him to be.

And I love him so much more for it.

That's the difference between having a crush and falling in love—I think. When I first met him, I was picturing all of the ways he was perfect—mind, body, and soul. I was completely convinced he didn't have a weakness. Completely without flaw. I've always been fascinated by people who appear to be superhuman. The select few of humanity who God decided would be the bar the rest of us can never reach.

But my Brad is most certainly flawed.

On our last date, we sat about as close as humanly possible without actually touching. I imagined what it would feel like if he held me into him so tightly that I molded around his body, fitting against him like his Taken T-shirt. That's what I want to be: his favorite thing to wear so that he never wants to take me off.

We sat there in the park, surrounded by other couples, (the envious many who had already smashed the touching barrier) watching the projector screen light up with images of Freddy Krueger joyfully slicing up the people of Elm Street. I guess I was sort of a baby and jumped during a few scenes. Brad asked if I liked scary movies, and I said about as much as having all of my teeth pulled from my gums.

"Yet another crazy contradiction of the mind of Miss Hailey Austin," he said, laughing while taking my hand and leading around the park while the credits rolled. "You never cease to amaze."

"Contradiction? How so?"

His eyes studied my face, searching for sincerity. "Well you're obviously not opposed to the horror genre."

I stared back, blankly. "What do you mean?"

He laughed again. "Your favorite book is easily one of the most twisted horror novels of all time."

I laughed along with him before realizing what was going on. "Wait. How do you know that?"

He led me up along a little stone bridge that was completely covered in fallen leaves, overlooking a waterfall illuminated in emerald green, lapping over slabs of stone within a small pond. "I found The Shatter House at the library after you told me about it," he said, releasing my hand and leaning forward against the edge of the bridge. "I was curious," he continued. "I wanted to know more about you. Figured that was one way to do it. Plus, it was infinitely better than asking you questions you would never answer."

I leaned forward next to him, giggling and sticking my tongue out, pretending to push him in while he pretended to fall.

"What about you? Would you swim after me if I fell?"

I looked down at the shallow water and laughed. "I don't think there would be any swimming in that water. More like crawling."

"I was captain of the synchronized crawling team at my old school," he said, eyebrow raised before breaking into laughter. "What if it was deeper?" he asked. "Deep as an ocean." His eyelashes fluttered, this time not to keep me away but to draw me in.

I stared at him, wondering if I wasn't the only person who knew the secret of his eyes. How many other girls had swam in them before?

"I'd swim after you," I said finally while looking back to the water, leaning over the bridge again and almost hoping I would fall in because I would have a better chance at survival than falling into Brad's eyes. "So how did you like it?"

"Huh?" he asked, nervously watching me.

"The book. I thought you read it."

"Currently reading it," he said proudly. "I'm, like, a hundred pages in."